With a large Italian family (and being one of the youngest cousins!) I feel like my summers have always been filled with wedding activities and this summer is no exception. There IS one big difference this year though.

Instead of being invited as a family, my cousin has invited my siblings and I to attend his wedding with our significant others. Previously, my father always took care of the gift but this year we’re all on our own and left wondering how much to spend! In the same boat? These tips will help you decide how much to spend.

Tips to decide how much to spend on a wedding gift

1. Consider Relationship & Wedding Location

It’s difficult to put a solid monetary value on a wedding gift, but a good rule of thumb is not to spend under $50. You may want to spend more depending on how close you are with the couple. Is this person a close friend, a coworker,  or a family member? These different relationships can change the amount you want to spend on the gift. You should also consider where the couple lives and the cost of living in that area. For example, if the couple lives in an urban setting they may be expecting a larger gift.  The Knot.com says this,” is the ballpark you should be aiming for:

Coworker and/or a distant family friend or relative: $50-$75
Relative or friend: $75-$100
Close relative or close friend: $100-$150
Urbanite: $150-200+”

2. What’s Your Salary?/What Can You Afford?

Have you just graduated from college or well established in your field? Have you recently become unemployed and struggling to get by? While the $50 gift limit is a good standard it is not the end all be all. If you truly cannot afford a gift be open with the bride and groom. Your presence should be enough if they know you’re struggling. Alternatively try creating a more sentimental or personal gift within your budget. Check these 12 frugal wedding gifts for ideas!

3. Are You Attending The Wedding?

Will you be attending the wedding or did you RSVP no? If you are not going to the wedding you can feel free to give a smaller gift. For example, there’s a lot of nice things to choose from at Kohl’s, and you can buy them at a bargain with a simple coupon. The bride and groom will not be paying for your meal or attendance to the wedding but you should still congratulate them with a gift.

4. Is This Their First Wedding?

If this is their second wedding you can give a little less if you attended their first wedding. Don’t give too much less though especially if it is the other person’s first wedding.

5. Are You Traveling?

Is this a destination wedding? Will you have to pay for a flight or hotel room. If so, consider buying a smaller gift off the registry. You should include your travel costs as a part of your gift to this couple considering you are traveling for them.

6. Did You Attend Pre-Wedding Events?

If you attend pre-wedding events such as the bridal shower or bachelorette party you often bring a gift. If this was the case keep in mind the presents you have already given. A good percentage is to spend 60% of the total gift cost on the final wedding gift.

Still not sure how much to give? This wedding gift calculator is a great way to get a ballpark figure on what to spend.  Keep in mind, that you should always only spend what you can afford.

How much do you spend on a wedding gift?