No one can deny that it’s a stressful world we live in. There are a million reasons to worry and that daily pressure can affect our health, relationships, and quality of life. On top of all our responsibilities, we are so busy that we have less and less time to fight stress as we should (you know, through exercise and a healthy diet).
Nearly ten years ago, my general practitioner along with my cardiologist diagnosed me with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). As a healthy twenty-four year old, I couldn’t believe that stress was causing me actual quantifiable cardiac symptoms. In fact, my body’s insufficient serotonin levels and subsequent poor handling of mental stress were causing me all kinds of clinical symptoms, from digestive issues to vision difficulties, and it turns out I’d been battling those issues for years.
Since my diagnosis I have used many different treatments for my anxiety and have found a combination of lifestyle habits and medication can make a big difference for me. I continue to seek new ways of improving my mental health and work hard to keep up the habits I have started, like exercising and getting enough sleep.
There is, however, one life change that I will never give up and it keeps me sane on a daily basis. It may surprise you, but just give me a chance to explain how this secret helps me. Don’t write it off, or laugh and click away. Before you leave, imagine how it could actually work for you. Here it is:
I arrive early for everything. I decided a long time ago that the unknown variables that could cause me to miss an appointment made me anxious, and I hated that feeling. I hated how I felt out of control when I was behind schedule, so I decided to shift my entire schedule. Even now that I am a stay at home mom of three kids, I am still able to arrive early for everything. All I do is anticipate when we should leave for an event and then shift my schedule up so that we are leaving thirty minutes earlier than necessary (or sometimes earlier for a formal or out of town event).
How did I become an early-bird? I shifted my entire schedule and started the habits to support that lifestyle like prepping lunches the night before, choosing outfits ahead of time, straightening up the house before I go to bed, and double-checking the school bags. One of the benefits is that when you leave thirty minutes early, you are less likely to forget things or make a mistake because you don’t have the stress of running late on your mind to distract you!
Arriving early means that sometimes there is waiting time. Sometimes the kids and I are sitting in the car for a few extra minutes. What do I do with that extra time? First, I turn on an audio book for the children, then I write in my Bullet Journal, I pick up the trash in the car, I style my hair, I call my mom, I go through the receipts in my purse, I send some texts out, I cull through my photos. Whatever I do, I am calm and cheerful because we are early and being early is awesome.
How would I spend those same minutes if I was on a typical last-minute schedule? Looking for my car keys, telling my kids to put their shoes on (again), washing the breakfast dishes, changing my skirt (again), lingering over my coffee, checking Facebook, trying to remember that one thing I know I am forgetting to take along with me. Whatever I am doing, I would be stressed and grumpy because I know that any small thing to go wrong will push us off schedule and make us late. And being late is stressful!
Would always being early take some of the stress off your shoulders or do you think I’m just a control freak gone too far? Let me know in the comments!
Welcome to Bargain Babe! I’m Mara, and I’m so glad you’re here. I am an obsessive bargain hunter and penny pincher, and I am determined to live a full life without EVER paying full price.
This sounds like me! I’ve always been an anxious person but only just realised this at the age of 32. After a couple of difficult and stressful years I developed IBS but it forced me to look at myself as a whole and understand myself more. Being organised has always been one of my strengths and now realise I’ve been that way to avoid stress and anxiety. I’m also a perfectionist possibly to avoid criticism and then stress/anxiety. My tip is use lists!! Lists for everything daily/weekly/monthly it helps get all thoughts and stress about tasks that need to be done out of my head and helps me feel positive when things on the list get crossed off. Thanks Nicki xx
Nicki, I’m a HUGE fan of lists! Have you checked out bullet journaling? My life-love of lists and organization are perfectly satisfied finally! http://bargainbabe.com/5-easy-steps-to-bullet-journal-nirvana/
Hello. I am usually a very organized person that lives on a list which makes me sane. However, lately I find myself dreaming that I run late or that I mess up something at work. It is so bad that I am loosing sleep. This really helped me this morning as it was the first thing I saw after another horrible dream.
I’m the father of a 15 daughter and she just recently revealed to me that she is dealing with social anxiety. I believe this article will definitely give her some ideas on how to better deal with it. Thank you.
So sorry to hear your daughter is dealing with symptoms of anxiety but it’s wonderful that she has you on her side!
I agree with you completely, I’m always early. I would rather be 30 minutes early than one minute late. Your advice is right on the money. Thank you for sharing your story.
A wonderful well written piece that I thoroughly enjoyed. Yes I think your suggestion holds water and I am sure to pin this. It’s sad that so many people don’t even know about anxiety. I am teased that I am OCD but I also find organising, planning and cleaning keeps me calm (if not always sane :)Good luck to all of us, may the sun shine on us always and in all ways.
You are not a control freak! You are awesome! I have anxiety and I’ve been dealing with it for three years now. Sadly after three years of battling I had to start with medication a month ago. Anyway, what I wanted to say is that unconsciously I’ve been unprocrastinating like you. Because it certainly helps a lot! I don’t have kids but I have four jobs which sometimes drives me crazy but it is much more easy by doing everything ahead of time. From monday to wednesday I try to do absolutelly everything I can ahead then the rest of the week things just fall into place. I even have time to do nothing or go out with my boyfriend. So yes, I agree with your method!
Yay! I love hearing from other early-birds!
I agree on some level. Being early gives you the luxury of not feeling stressed. However, be mindful of stressing others. If someone is having an event at their home, you stress THEM out arriving too early. Even if you’re just sitting in their driveway waiting for the exact time to knock on their door. When I say 3 pm that’s what time I will be ready to open my door. I used to have a client who would come way early and it would rattle my chain knowing she was sitting outside like a stalker in my driveway. I needed that time to grab a bite to eat or use the bathroom and would feel rushed and uncomfortable……and stressed. So although it works for YOU, someone else might consider it rude or inconsiderate. My father used to say,”people who come too early are just as rude as people who come late!” He was a stickler for punctuality……ON TIME…all the time. I’m not a perfectionist like that but I totally understand now what he was talking about.
That’s a very good point. To my chagrin, my social engagements rarely include parties or events at homes. I agree, it is not polite or socially acceptable to arrive early to someone’s home. When I talk about getting somewhere early, I’m referring to doctor’s appointments (waiting room), group events (park/pool), church (parking lot), or work. If I am running early to a home, I usually pull into a restaurant or store parking lot to kill time close to the destination.
Yes! Arriving early tames my anxiety, as well. I make sure to bring my checklist with me so that any extra waiting time is productive and prevents my mind from pondering the next set of “what-ifs”.
I also have anxiety, I have been early for everything. My husband can’t believe that I like to get to the movies a half hour before it starts. I use that time to clean up my phone and just people watch and relax. My hairdresser, manicurist, reflex person all know I will show up early. I did have a neighbor that was constantly late that told me it was rude to pick her up early if we were going somewhere.
Hi Leah,
I would like to know if I could reference your blog please?
Please could you email me on the email address provided?
Many thanks
I do the exact same thing! I HAVE to be 5-10 minutes early or else I feel late/something terrible might happen (an anxiety tick in of itself). Getting to a place early keeps the anxiety lower.
Thanks for sharing your perspective!
Anxiety is real and a lot of people see it as a weakness.It is an illness and runs in families.
Please don’t let anyone play down this condition.Thank you everyone for being opened about this subject.I am in my late sixties and have found it can be bought out by real or imagined situations.I use power walking and audiobooks as my method to calm me down.
Be happy with who you are,not what illness you may have.
Peace and Love!
I am 23 and starting having anxiety attacks about 5 months ago. I lost my grandparents 2 months apart from each other and after that was when I had my first attack. I have finally seen a doctor and he’s sending me to a cardiologist, he also recommended to see an eye doctor because one of my eyes is slower than the other and I’ve had perfect vision my whole life now all the sudden it’s blurred. My digestive system is not the same as it use to be and my stomach aches cause me more anxiety. It’s so good to know all this is most likely from anxiety and not an underlying disease! Thanks for sharing!
Hi my grandson is 10 years and suffers from Anxiety OCD and is high functioning autism.
He likes to be at school at 8.30am he doesn’t start until 9am, it is so hard to watch him struggle every single day bless him, and now he hasn’t got in to the senior school that he wanted to go to so that he could be with his friends. His mum is in his corner though fighting to get his school changed, she knows what it like as she has suffered with it too since the age of nine, i still have to step in to help her when she needs me.
Thank you so much for sharing.
I can definitely relate to this. I try to be super early for anything and if im not I’ll become really stressed out and imagine something terrible happening. The only time I’m ever late is when a bus hasn’t arrived on time, which creates so much unnecessary stress. I struggle to breathe calmly, and my heart will not stop racing. Its a really horrible feeling.
Thanks for sharing.
A very interesting story that inspired me to work on my mental health. I recently had some problems and went to https://ca.calmerry.com/ where a qualified therapist prescribed me a course of online therapy. Which helped me tremendously. So decided to share.