Comment to win this book!
Discovering secret credit cards, unpaid bills, and debt is a blow many couples cannot survive. In fact, money is the number one cause of breakups, says the married authors of “First Comes Love, Then Comes Money: A Couple’s Guide to Financial Communication.” Comment below to win my review copy.
Unlike most personal finance books, this one is not going to teach you to balance your budget or live debt free:
Why? Because without healthy financial communication, without a commitment to putting an end to financial infidelity, none of that stuff works. After more than thirty-five years of combined experience as financial advisers, we’ve learned that if you don’t know how to talk about money with your partner, if you don’t know how to keep financial infidelity from destroying your relationship, budgets and plans and payments won’t mean squat.
The first part of the book deals with discovering each partner’s financial personality, and how they can create conflict. The book divides everyone into five personalities: the saver, spender, risk taker, security seeker, or flyer. I’m definitely a saver or security seeker. Clashing financial personalities can cause major damage, even divorce.
The second section is about uncovering financial infidelity using what the Palmer’s call the Financial Relationship Index. Both partners take a quiz, earn a score of 0-100, then read what that score means. A lower score is best! The third and final part shares three basic financial communication tools to move forward, including a monthly “Money Huddle.”
All this in 189 pages spread over eight chapters and three appendices. The only trick is to be most effective, you’ve got to read it with your other half.
To win my review copy, comment below on why you need this book. Comment by Aug. 16 at 11:59 p.m. to win! If you can’t wait, buy a copy from Amazon for $6 (orig. $15).
August 10th, 2011 at 9:30 am
WOW!!! this is the perfect book for me and my fiance. We have just started to have some financial conversations, but I don’t really know where to start. We both have some debt from university and we need to talk about how we focus on paying it back. I would love to win this book so that we can start off our marriage on the right financial footing.
August 10th, 2011 at 9:47 am
This is the perfect book for me and my fiance! We are getting married September 10, 2011 and we just had a conversation yesterday about the debt we have. I am a probably a saver/security seeker and he is a risk-taker or flyer and we really need help with managing money and debt with our clashing personalities. This is a must have for us!
August 10th, 2011 at 11:23 am
Understanding the personality type of your mate is such a wonderful thing! You’d be surprised how much more you an tolerate and are willing to work with someone when you understand their thought process. Not only are you able to do it better you enjoy the time on this issue. I would love to have this book to help deepen the relationship with my husband.
August 10th, 2011 at 11:42 am
I’ve been reading a few marriage books but haven’t got into the personal finance section of it yet. Would love to read the book and get me and the hubby on the same page.
August 10th, 2011 at 12:43 pm
I want to give this book to my daughter and her fiance. It would be a valuable gift for them as they start their lives together!
August 10th, 2011 at 1:48 pm
We’ve been married a while now, but the hubby and I have only recently become more fiscally responsible and aligned in our financial goals. I think this book would help us stay on track!
August 10th, 2011 at 3:13 pm
This is exactly what I’ve been looking for to intersperse “money planning” talks with “wedding planning” talks with my fiance! We have different styles but similar goals, and I am hoping we can stay focused on our shared goals to help manage the harder parts of syncing our styles and communicating about big purchases.
August 10th, 2011 at 3:24 pm
My wife and I have been married for 16yrs 8months 24days. We have nomonetary communication at all. We make it,it gets spent. This book is correct in stating that without knowing how to communicate about money,budgets,plans newver get to fruition. Please send me the book!
August 10th, 2011 at 4:23 pm
I need this book to help save my marriage
August 10th, 2011 at 5:30 pm
My husband and I have only been married for a couple of years, so I think this book would be useful as we begin making future plans.
August 10th, 2011 at 10:32 pm
I need this book because everytime my fiance and I talk about anything related to money it starts an argument. I’m a saver; he’s a spender, and it is not working at all. I just want us to be on the same page before we take that final step, and this book seems like the perfect answer!
August 11th, 2011 at 11:45 am
I’d love to give this to my son and daughter-in-law who have only been married two years and just had their first child. They haven’t run into money problems yet but are learning how they have to buckle down and manage things more tightly now that the baby is here.
August 12th, 2011 at 6:30 am
[...] forget to comment on my original contest post for a chance to win my review copy of “First Comes Love, Then Comes Money: A Couple’s Guide [...]
August 12th, 2011 at 9:50 am
We have been married for a while now, but we are still trying to find a good balance between our financial personalities.
August 12th, 2011 at 12:02 pm
i definitely need this book, we are 29 days away from matrimony and we need to be financially ready to take on this new stage of life!!!! pick us! – the (soon-to-be) Klein’s =)
August 12th, 2011 at 1:11 pm
My husband and I were married on May 7th of this year. We are polar opposites when it comes to finances. I’m all organized and he hasn’t paid his $15 minimum credit card payment in 3 months. He spends over $300/ month on coffee while I clip coupons! This could be our help!!
August 12th, 2011 at 4:26 pm
I totally need this book. And the Grocery University audio book… my boyfriend and I are moving into a condo together and the only reason we got it was be cause of my credit. He has a bad habit of spending cuz he has it. But doesn’t even realize this will break us up eventually. I dome best to explain saving and being thrifty but this book will help us out so much! Please pick me
August 12th, 2011 at 7:10 pm
After 27 years of marriage and not having any more money now then when we were first married, I think it’s time for some intervention and this book sounds like just the thing. While I was away for a few months taking care of my dying mother, my husband was charging our bills and taking out advanced loans on our credit cards until they were all maxed out. I found out about it all a year later when he said he couldn’t pay the bills anymore with what we make. What a shocker! We’re at the stage where we need to get on the same page, regroup, and get these bills paid and he’ll have to earn my trust back. Please help us out. After we’ve read it, we’ll pass it on to our oldest son, who hasn’t learned the difference between a want and a need yet, and has his own debts he struggles to pay.
August 13th, 2011 at 5:29 pm
I currently live with my boyfriend and things are going really good. However, we are not planning on getting married until we get our money/debt situation figured out. He is in a lot of debt. I don’t want to marry into debt. I need this book to get things under control so I can marry my soulmate.
August 14th, 2011 at 9:23 am
This sounds like a great book. I’d like to read it and then pass it on to my daughter who is just now moving in with her boyfriend.
alsam66 at gmail dot com
August 14th, 2011 at 1:32 pm
I am a newlywed (July bride!), so this would be a perfect gift to start our life together!
August 15th, 2011 at 4:47 am
This would be great for me and my husband. We are always looking for ways to improve our communication! Money is an especially tricky subject!
August 15th, 2011 at 6:34 pm
I need this because money issues are one of the top reasons for divorce and I would like to know that when I remarry, I won’t have to “re-divorce”!
Thanks!
August 16th, 2011 at 8:47 am
My husband and I really need this book. It is not that we don’t communicate with each other about finances but rather I see that it is HOW we communicate that can make the difference. I need to read this book to learn how to allow our two different “money personalities” live happily ever after.
August 16th, 2011 at 9:52 am
This would be awesome especially after a divorce and starting a new relationship. Want to be on the right track
August 19th, 2011 at 7:38 pm
The question I have for you is, do you believe that restoring love and rebuilding your marriage can begin today? If you said “yes” then I applaud you because fifty percent the battle is alreadyly won, if you believe in your mind and heart that your marriage can be transformed.